Category Archives: Conspiracies
These days
So, Times, what you’re telling me is, the kids are wearing bulletproof vests… for fashion? Does anyone want to deconstruct that move for me?
“The trend to protective gear is pretty strong right now,” said Richard Geist, the founder of Uncle Sam’s Army Navy Outfitters in downtown Manhattan. “It’s big with rappers, alternative types and even [...]
Also posted in Nature Leave a comment
This isn’t what that is for
Someone used Yelp to rate a boyfriend. That’s pretty crude, I think. It was probably more crude for me to throw my two cents in there.
We’re laughing with you, Eric, we swear.
Posted in Conspiracies 2 Comments
Later for the date than the Hadron Collider
Been popping quaaludes all morning and I still can’t get my mind around space and time, but I think it goes something like this:
So remember the Hadron Collider, which, some scientists speculate, might through normal use accidentally tear a hole in the universe through which all life as we know it would pass and be [...]
Also posted in Nature Leave a comment
Forever in your debt, charitable God of Mischief
The Hipster Grifter’s mailing address (or should I say jailing address, HAW HAW HAW) is on the internet. Matter of fact, now its on the internet twice:
Kari Farrell (Inmate SO 295558)
Salt Lake County Correctional Facility
3415 South 900 West
Salt Lake City, UT 84119
For the uninitiated, Farrell spent the last few years between sea and shining sea, [...]
Also posted in Williamsburg Leave a comment
BREAKING: Blog post sparks semi-sane debate about important topic
Gothamist posted a reader-submitted photograph today (reposted here, to the left), of a sign outside the Williamsburg bar Hugs, which, at first glance, seems to be a fairly direct exclusion of a certain demographic.
For what its worth, my personal take is that, inadvertently or otherwise, there is a racial element present here, but aside from [...]
Also posted in Booze & Drug Leave a comment
Bonner-oo Continues: A Baker’s Dozen Doesn’t Count
In case you were lucky or drunk enough to miss it, there is this lobbying firm in Washington that specializes in grassroots organizing Microsoft Paint and lying. Specifically what they do is copy (ctrl+c) the letterhead from a real organization, paste it (ctrl+v) at the top of a letter praising the benefits of coal or something, and then they [...]
Also posted in Booze & Drug, Media, Politics Leave a comment
Bingo! Update on Japanese Aliens
Just yesterday we broke the story on Aliens taking over the Japanese government. You might remember that near the end of that article we said this:
Sometimes all you have to do is provide leading coverage on one crappy story to catapult a crap website with mediocre, or even no content whatsoever, into one of the most highly trafficked sites [...]
Poking Holes in the Huntsville Donut Caper
Another day, another conspiracy here at WTPWB. This one takes us far from our Brooklyn roots, and down south to Todd P’s unfortunate home state of Texas. Specifically the micropolitan area of Huntsville, Texas. Yeah, it sounded familiar to us too. To save you the google search, you’re trying to come up with the name [...]
Posted in Conspiracies 1 Comment
Things about Japan that Todd P doesn’t know
I bet Todd P did not know that Japan is run by aliens. I bet you didn't know either, but here at WTPWB, our brand of rough-and-tumble-get-to-the-bottom-of-the-issue-hard-hitting journalism aims to inform. So let's really crack the lid off of this one.
The first, and most telling sign that any country is about to succumb to an alien invasion is when the guy they elect to be premier is married to someone who has traveled to Venus. Seriously.
Also posted in Politics Leave a comment
Doc Anthrax