“Pre” School of Architectural Criticism Taking Hold

AYBaseThree. That’s the number of design iterations that have now been put forth for the Atlantic Yards Barclays Center in South Brooklyn. Coincidentally, three also seems to be the average age of every critic and journalist assigned to cover the new design.

First, Curbed points out a major biff in Architect Magazine’s coverage, where a presumably three year old writer threw a story together claiming that Atlantic Yards was in Williamsburg and apparently didn’t know that the Nets were a basketball team.

But the truly shocking response has come from reviews of the design itself. Instead of offering any sort of insightful analysis–pros and cons and whatnot, critics, journalists, and politicians alike have reverted to just naming things that the arena resembles. Let’s look at some:

AY 1

Councilwoman Letitia James – Ship from Battlestar Galactica (Accuracy: 2.4/10)

AY 2

Commenter at Brownstoner - Foreman Grill (Accuracy: 4.6/10)

AY5

Developdontdestroy.org – House from Sleeper (Accuracy: 8.7/10)

Other hilarious suggestions included a deflated basketball and BP Marty Markowitz’s LSD inspired take that the arena resembles “a luminous, iconic structure that celebrates Brooklyn’s industrial heritage.” We figure we better put some of our own ideas in the mix too, while we’re at it:

AY3 An Oyster

AY7Robocop’s Face

AY6An especially sleek bottle opener

Leave your ideas in the comments. Also, notice how vaguely the other buildings in the complex were rendered in this depiction? It’s probably because Ratner doesn’t want anyone to ask what he’s planning on putting in there. But luckily, we already answered that question.

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